Have You Heard of Theater Sports?
by Matt Eagan
As I finished my Sourdough
Jack, I began to plan out the rest of my Saturday afternoon. I was with a friend who is
very hard to keep entertained so I had to come up with something original. I thought of
the obvious things - go to the movies or walk the mall, but I needed to think of something
that I hadn't done before. About the only thing left in sleepy Sacramento that I hadn't
done was go to theater sports. I ran the idea past my friend and he reluctantly agreed. We
had a common friend who participates in theater sports so at the very least we could
embarrass and annoy him.
Once we had discarded our rubbish in the appropriate receptacle (see Fr. McGary, we do
throw our trash away), we quickly proceeded to Jesuit. As it turned out, our hastiness was
not required because we arrived an hour early. So, we watched them set up and talked to
the other members of theater sports. Forty-five minutes passed by and most the players
hadn't arrived and there was almost nobody in the audience. I actually expected a low
turnout because who has actually heard anything about theater sports?
Some people suggested that
they cancel the performance, but then something amazing happened. Everybody showed up at
one time. Within ten minutes, all the players had arrived and the room was packed with
students, siblings and parents. Being the lucky guy I am, I was asked to be one of four
judges for their games. Once everybody had settled down, the show began.
I was very impressed. Twenty out of
twenty-one games were actually funny. Now, I'm not going to tell you about each game, but
the format is much like the television show "Who's Line is it Anyway?" These
people are really brave. Not many people can stand up in front of a large crowd and just
be consistently funny. I strongly suggest that if you have Mr. Warren for English, go
watch because you get extra credit. For everybody else, watch because
..THE ROCK SAYS
THEY ARE GOOD. Really. He said that.
By the way, senior Lorenzo Patino and junior Chris Solis were MVPs this Saturday.
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